Words True, Loving & Necessary
My Dear People,
"For all of us make mistakes. Anyone who makes no mistakes is perfect, able to keep the whole body in check with a bridle. If we put bits into the mouths of horses to make them obey us, we guide the whole bodies. Or look at ships: though they are so large that it takes strong winds to drive them, yet they are guided by a very small rudder wherever the will of the pilot directs. So also the tongue is a small member, yet it boasts great exploits."
--The Book of James, Chapter 3
The tongue is small, and yet immensely powerful. Words issue forth, for good, for ill, with less thought, with more: words of all kinds. Marriages and wars are started and ended with words. Words echo through our memory and our identity: I love you. You hurt me. I forgive you. Thank you. You are beautiful. I will. I can't. Goodbye. Help. Bless you. Peace.
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James continues, "How great a forest is set ablaze by a small fire! And the tongue is the fire...and it is itself set on fire by hell." (Nobody ever accused James of being shy.)
Words can be devastatingly destructive when they are weaponized.
There are some words that we must simply remove from the arsenal. We will never use them.
(And, meanwhile, we work at dismantling the arsenal itself.)
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Words can also carry light, and hope, and courage, and kindness, and deep healing.
There are words that are worthy of carrying in our hip pocket, ready for regular use.
(And this may call for practice.)
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The Franciscan Richard Rohr says, with Jamesian bluntness, "Don't talk unless it is true; don't talk unless it is loving; and, finally, don't talk unless it is necessary. And even if we pass through these three--'the best things can not be talked about!'"
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May we choose our words well. May we choose silence often. And may we remember that, finally, the most compelling and powerful word we speak is the word we live.
We'll get it wrong sometimes; we're not perfect. Amends may be in order.
And yet we can be sure that another opportunity to get it right will come along soon enough.
Your brother in Christ,
Wallace+
