There is a Balm in Gilead
A Sermon by The Rev. Wallace Adams-Riley
Rector, St. Paul's Episcopal Church
Sunday, March 7, 2010 - The Third Sunday in Lent
Audio: James
This Sunday was also the National Week of Prayer for the Healing of AIDS. In this clip from Sunday's sermon, Wallace+ talks about his friend James. The backing track is audio of Robin Harris-Jones, Soprano, singing "One" by U2 as the Gathering Hymn.
Audio: Full Sermon
Sermon Text
Dear God,
take my lips and speak through them;
take our minds, and think through them;
take our souls, Lord, and, we
pray, do what needs doing;
Amen.
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There is a balm in Gilead
To make
the wounded whole;
There is
a balm in Gilead
To heal
the sin-sick soul.
Sometimes
I feel discouraged,
And
think my work's in vain
But then
the Holy Spirit
Revives
my soul again
+
Has your soul ever been sickened?
Has fear, or even despair perhaps, left your soul sick?
Or maybe it was anger?
Or blame, or grief.
+
If we're honest; if we have known our own souls, at any depth; we know that, yes, we have had those times, those moments, and, indeed, those seasons, of our lives when our souls have been sickened.
And, indeed, we may be living through one of those times even now.
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And it is in such times that we know the truth of this morning's collect, (this morning's prayer), "Almighty God, you know that we have no power in ourselves to help ourselves."
"...no power in ourselves to help ourselves."
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No, will power alone doesn't cut it.
No amount of sheer cussedness, or stoicism, or character, or determination, we can muster is finally enough to overcome a sickness of the soul. No, we must turn, instead, as the Twelve-Step programs say, to a power greater than ourselves, to find the healing, to find again the wholeness we seek; indeed, the wholeness that God desires for each of us, his children.
+ + +
Today being the beginning of the National Week of Prayer for the Healing of AIDS, I cannot help but think of a certain friend.
James had had a recurring infection in his leg; that involved reddening and swelling and soreness. It really bothered him. I knew about it, and wasn't sure what to think about it. Occasionally he would be laid up for a day or more, in discomfort.
Well, I remember the path we were walking on when he told me; I remember the red-brick building and portico to our left; and the Magnolia tree just there; and the mulch spread so neatly and carefully, along the path; where we had walked so many other times; I remember all of that, as though it were just yesterday; when he told me that he had been diagnosed HIV+.
And he said it almost cheerfully. Because, I suppose, he couldn't come up with any other way to say it.
One thing I can't remember is what I said back to him.
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I do remember, on the other hand, what I did a few days later.
And, indeed, my soul was sickened.
We were both kneeling at the rail. The patten had already gone by, and we had received the bread.
And, just as the cup came to him, my mind lurched into overdrive and I found myself intensely focused on the fact that he would drink from the cup, and then that I would drink from the cup, immediately after him.
I had been told that there was no risk of contracting the virus by such means - of course not, right? - and yet, there I was, with only half a moment to consider if I really believed that.
+
And so I dipped the wafer into the wine. (I intincted.)
And then made my way back to the pew; just after him...
+
Later, after we had left church, James just said, "Wallace, I don't think I've ever seen you intinct before."
And he didn't need to say anything more.
I said that I was sorry.
I felt horrible.
What I knew is that I had let fear get the better of me.
It (fear) had come barreling up from the depths and smashed aside my determination to be a strong and present support for my friend, at a critical time in his life.
I was appalled. And, indeed, my soul was sick.
And so was James.
+ +
Thanks be to God, our friendship more than recovered.
(It became stronger, in fact.)
Nonetheless, that moment of weakness, of fear, of soul sickness, will forever stand for me as a reminder of how, again in the words of this morning's collect, of how "we have no power in ourselves to help ourselves," and how, therefore, (again, in the words of the collect,) how, therefore, we must turn to God to "keep us both outwardly in our bodies and inwardly in our souls."
We turn to God as the Source, as the One from whom all blessings flow; the One who will give us all that we need to live and, indeed, to flourish. We recognize God, we know God, as the Source of everything we need.
That is, until we don't; that is, until fear, or hatred, or pride, or grief, wedges its way in, and we fall back upon ourselves, and our own instincts.
"Who am I," Moses asks, in fear, "who am I that I should go to Pharaoh, and bring the Israelites out of Egypt?"
And, from the Burning Bush, God answers, "I will be with you"
The divine answer continues, but it is the opening phrase that says it all, "I will be with you," just as Jesus will later say.
In other words, "Moses, it's not about you, my child. No, it doesn't all hinge on who you are (or aren't). And so you don't need to give over to that fear crawling up your spine. I, YHWH, will be with you; and I will show you the way. I will give you what you need, to do what I ask you to do."
Paul, our patron, would write the Corinthians, eons later, affirming this same faith: As he put it, in this morning's epistle, "God is faithful, and he will not let you be tested beyond your strength, but with the testing will also provide the way out so that you may be able to endure it."
Yes, God is faithful. And God will provide.
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Yes, God is faithful. That is the constant. The question is whether we will be faithful.
Will we keep faith. Will we trust, in God. In the face of fear; in the face of suffering; in the face of anger; and grief. In face of disease. Will we let anything get between us and our trust in God; our trust that God will show us the way; our trust that God will provide.
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Today, we join with communities of faith from around Richmond, and across the country, under the banner of "The Balm in Gilead," to pray for the healing of AIDS.
May God indeed help us to keep faith; may God help us to trust in him; and may God help us to do his will.
It starts with prayer, faithful prayer. (Everything does.)
And may God lead us from there.
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Yes, there is a balm in Gilead...
To make the wounded whole;
There is a balm in Gilead...
To heal the sin-sick soul.
Sometimes we may feel discouraged,
And think our work's in vain
But then the Holy Spirit
Revives our souls again...
